Create Resilience with Uncertainty

Many of us are struggling with anxiety, fears, worries, ruminations, and similar challenges. What these all have in common is that they are future-focused and deeply rooted in the unknown or uncertainty. There's a concept in psychology known as "intolerance of uncertainty." I’ve delved into this idea because it made me realize that instead of always fixating on the specific fear itself, we might benefit from addressing a more fundamental issue - our fear of uncertainty. If we were less afraid of the uncertainty surrounding the things we fear, we would become more resilient and better equipped to handle those fears. This shift in perspective could create a new and empowering energy in our lives.

Building resilience to uncertainty essentially means improving our ability to tolerate stress. When something triggers discomfort, our bodies naturally enter a state of arousal. Ideally, we want to raise the threshold of arousal we can handle before anxiety sets in. Once we achieve this, we can approach our triggers with greater resilience and even begin to explore them with curiosity, gradually easing into gentle exposure therapy.

There are several techniques that can help build this resilience, and many of them are well-known. One of the more commonly known tools is breathwork. Practices such as yogic breathing (pranayama), Wim Hof breathing, or other controlled breathwork methods can be incredibly beneficial. Neuroscientist Andrew Huberman explains that breath is the fastest way to shift mental and emotional states because of its immediate effects on the autonomic nervous system, through the movement of the diaphragm and its impact on the vagus nerve. Integrating breathwork with yoga poses can be particularly powerful. While yoga is often associated with calmness, it also challenges us to hold uncomfortable positions longer than we might like, all while maintaining a focus on our breath. This practice increases our tolerance for discomfort and helps us stay present instead of seeking external distractions.

Cold therapy is another effective method. Whether it's a cold shower or an ice bath, consciously choosing to enter a stressful state and remaining in it, focusing on the breath, teaches us to stay present rather than fleeing to distractions.

Endurance training that targets heart rate variability (HRV) is also worth considering. HRV measures how well we can adapt our internal physiological state to match our external environment. The better our HRV, the more accurately we can respond to what’s actually happening around us, rather than reacting to our fears and worries, which are often illusions.

While these somatic therapies (body-based methods) are powerful, they are most effective when combined with cognitive and neural therapies. As you engage in these physical practices, it’s important to also work with a therapist to uncover the root causes of your fears and anxieties. This dual approach - addressing both the body and the mind - can lead to lasting emotional freedom.

When it comes to exposure therapy, it's important to start with smaller triggers; don't go straight to the big stuff too soon, wait until your nervous system is ready. Identify areas in your life where you feel uncomfortable and experience mild anxiety or discomfort. Instead of avoiding these situations or resorting to immediate distractions, try to confront them directly. You'll be surprised to discover how frequently you tend to avoid or distract yourself from even these minor discomforts—I know I was!

Start considering how skilled you can become at being resilient in the face of uncertainty. For example, imagine being okay with not knowing the result of a test, the outcome of a health exam, how an audience will respond to your speech, how a dog will react to yours, what that unusual sound was, or what that lump on your skin might be. While there's a possibility that your fear could be triggered, imagine a reality where your body doesn’t immediately respond with adrenaline surges and a flood of catastrophic thoughts. Instead, you could remain curious and poised, ready to face whatever comes with calm and confidence.

Just picture that kind of world!